It is officially January 1st, 2019! I can not believe that 2018 is now a memory. I am writing this post on my way back to New York City. I decided that I wanted to spend New Years in Niagara Falls. I have always wanted to go to Niagara Falls. Me being a water lover and one that derives her sense of peace being near large bodies of water, I thought it would be the perfect way to bring in the New Year. Unfortunately, things didn’t go as planned and I didn’t get a chance to view the falls. Babe doesn’t have a passport and therefore we stayed on the US side, which is not as eventful as the Canadian side. Nevertheless, whenever I get
I have a long journey ahead of me on the way back to New York; so I have a lot of time to reflect, meditate and pray. I spent the first part of this trip writing my New Years Resolution. I have made resolutions before, but this is the first year that I actually wrote it down. Why? I have learned that resolutions that are not written are more than likely to dissipate. I organized my resolution into a few different categories: PERSONALLY, PROFESSIONALLY AND CREATIVELY. I wrote down all the things that I want to accomplish in 2019. It also gives me the opportunity to review my list to make sure I am on track. Holding myself accountable.
In September 2018 I was diagnosed with a disease that will require treatment. I will not divulge the details at this time. I will do so eventually when I am more comfortable. Let’s just say, that it was the last thing that I would ever expect to happen to me. My world was literally turned upside down and I am still coming to grips with it. I am very thankful that I have a loving mother, partner, and supportive family members. I have also sought the assistance of a therapist, which was the best decision that I made. I would suggest therapy to everyone. Mental health is a key factor that I am focusing on in 2019.
To be personally frank I lost my way in 2018. Going through my everyday life as if I were a robot. I was concentrating on all the wrong things while important things were neglected. My spiritual growth was one of the things that were neglected. I was raised in a church. I was a former Sunday School Teacher, Choir Member and a Lay Eucharistic Minister. Then I stopped. Came up with excuses why I couldn’t attend. I prayed less and less and then finally ceased talking to God entirely. Just merely called upon him when I needed him. That is not how God works and he taught me that the HARD way. I took my relationship with God for granted. In 2019 I have made it my business to have regular conversations with Christ. In the morning before I start my day I pray. I have my morning cup of French Vanilla Cappuccino, read my Daily Word or Bible App, Pray and start my day on a high note. I have even put a reminder on my phone too.
I have also neglected my health in 2018. Sure, I went to my regular doctor’s appointments, but what I did in between those doctors appointments was the problem. Do you know what I did? NOTHING. Absolutely, NOTHING. I went on and off Weight Watchers. Opting for fries instead of a salad and those poor decisions showed on the scale as my weight crept up and up! Now yes, I am plus size, however, I can be plus size AND be healthy. That is what I am focusing on in 2019. BEING HEALTHY. Mentally and physically. I marvel at the fact that my brother works out every morning before he goes to work. I am not that disciplined yet, but I have started going back to the gym two days a week. What has helped is scheduling gym time on my calendar with a correlating alarm to remind me the day before.
If there is one thing that I need to learn in 2019 is to FORGIVE. I am a fierce friend. Anyone who knows me personally can attest to that fact. I have a great ear and often give advice (when asked) lovingly and without judgment. However, there are times when a friendship is tested. I can become angry and distant to the point of ceasing all communication with the party. I hold on to grudges far too long. I am not the only person who has noticed it. I have been told by my mother, brother, and even my lover. I plan on rectifying that in 2019. Perhaps the relationship will never be the same, but at least I would have made amends. That’s most important. To that person in question, my first blogger boo. I forgive you.
Curvy Intuition has always been my creative outlet. My little piece of real estate on the internet. I have neglected you too my loyal readers. Not because I wanted it to. I felt inadequate. I started comparing my blog to other successful bloggers and I would always say ” I wish my website was as good as hers.” or ” Her pictures are amazing, mine never come out that beautiful.” Well, there is a reason for that. The reason is simple. There can only be one me. I need to concentrate on me being ME! I am always going to read and visit my favorite blogs, obtain inspiration, and research, but I am no longer going to compare their success to mine. I am just going to concentrate on making Curvy Intuition better. I am even considering taking a photography class. I need to learn to edit my photos properly.
Lastly, what I am looking forward to in 2019? To sum it up in one word? Growth! I am looking forward to growing as a person; as a woman. Becoming a better person, daughter, sibling, family member, lover, friend, entrepreneur, and writer. I am looking forward to a better relationship with Christ, becoming a healthier and happier personal mentally and physically. Here’s to you 2018! Thank you for the lessons and memories. Cheers.
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